All the things I'm not saying...

What I need to do is to go for a good run.

I'm feeling 7 miles. Pain at Mile 4.5, Hope at Mile 5, Rugged Determination at Mile 6.5.
Relief at Mile 7.

That would I think solve my problems. Not that I have many problems - it is more an inner feeling of restlessness I have. Yoga doesn't...can't satisfy my urges to ejercicio with all my might. Swimming might be able to - but it is just so darn cold. I despise being cold. I almost went last night around 7 - after my Traditional China, His 340K class. But I forgot my sweater at home - so when I exited Garrison the cool, cool air assaulted my bare arms and bare, brown skirted legs. I decided just recovering from illness that perhaps I shouldn't freeze myself and then have to walk around campus. It would have felt nice though. It would have felt nice...

My poetry hasn't been discussed again in poetry. I think I'm on the schedule for tomorrow. I wrote a poem about a skirt but titled it, "Young Brunnette at the Park." - Although, I wasn't at the park when I wrote it. Instead, I was imagining being at the park on a very beautiful, sunny day last week. I was imaginging being at Central Park - sipping some sort of lemonadey beverage - watching kids scream and crawl over each other at the playground. I hope I am the sort of person who brings her children to the playground to scream and crawl over other, unknown children often. Children need to be on playgrounds. Children need to be outside. If there are two things I believe in for health and healing - it would be the power of the human touch and the power of fresh air and sunlight. And Jesus - which might make a total of four things, but I digress.

My sample test for Mirco is 17 pages long. SEVEN-TEEN-PAGES! Diez y siete. Hay too many. It makes me feel defeated before I even try. And most of it is about Gram staining - which I'm still not too clear on. Ohhh Mircobiologists and your silly gram stains.

I read... /skimmed... David Taylor's blog. I keep getting behind and although I find his writing very interesting I also feel defeated when I have too much blog to catch up on. Apparently there are many times at which I feel defeated. Like everytime I think about bleaching my sofa cushions. The taking them off part defeats me. I need to wait for Matt to help me, but then who wants to bleach sofa cushions when you are in the presence of your best friend and handsome love? No one - that is who.

Did you know that I obsess over everything I eat? Constantly aware of nutrients that the baby is getting.. or isn't getting... on a daily basis. Some people approach pregnancy unchanged... and I am plagued by every guilty pleasure I indulge in. I should eat more carrots or something. Last night, after I ate dinner at a location which will remain undisclosed (lets just say - it wasn't healthy) I made a large leafy green salad for an after-dinner "maybe-the-baby-will-only-get-this-and-bypass-all-the-crap-i-just-ate" snack.

Silly. And I ate two hershey kisses and no ice cream. So there.

I miss reading literature about Mother Teresa. There are only so many books out there - I may have to cut myself off sometime soon.

I have been thinking a LOT lately about where we will go. As in, I want to start talking about our 5-7 year plan for leaving the country to live and have an adventure and share Jesus in a new cultural setting. I want to praying into something - getting excited for it, learning language for it. Matt and I need to have a discussion....